Heart to Heart
by Tennischica12683
Summary: Tara is desperate to know for sure where she stands with Christian and if there is any hope of being with him again. Christian is torn between staying to be with Tara or spending the summer with Raf. Set after the Prix at the end of season 2... What I think should have happened. Let me know what you think! Thanks! *** I DON'T OWN DANCE ACADEMY! ***
1. Chapter 1

**Tara **

The cold night air hit her face like a hard slap as she ran out of the opera house. It was dark, but the lights had come on and she had a good vantage point as her eyes searched the area frantically. Finally, in the distance, she saw him and began running down the steps as she shouted, "Christian! Christian, wait!" When he didn't stop, she ran faster and shouted louder, "Christian, please stop!" He stopped, but she could tell he was torn between whether he should wait for her or keep walking. He turned hesitantly, as though he was unsure of what he should do.

"What do you want Tara?" He wasn't angry exactly, but she could hear the exasperation in his voice. She could feel his eyes on her as she took a moment to catch her breath, trying to think about what she would say so it wouldn't come out wrong. She didn't want to make things worse, but after the conversation they had in the dressing room, he owed her an explanation. She had let him walk away so many times before, but not this time. This time, he was going to talk to her. She stared straight into his eyes with determination.

"You know what I want. I want to talk to you. We need to talk for real this time, without any interruptions. How could you just leave like that? We weren't done with Sammy's dance! Didn't you even want to see if I had won?" As she spoke these last words, she couldn't keep the pain out of her voice. Couldn't he see how much she still loved him? That despite everything that had happened this year, she missed him so much and wanted nothing more than to be with him?

During their conversation before, she had wanted to tell him how she really felt, but she was afraid. That he didn't feel the same way. That he would reject her again. That he would say something hurtful and make her feel stupid for expecting anything from him anymore. If she waited until she knew how he felt, then she would be able to go on believing that they could be together, that there was a possibility that everything would go back to normal, the way it was supposed to be. But as she had stood in the dressing room holding her breath, waiting for him to say what she was so sure he wanted to say, Abigail had come back and interrupted them, shooing Christian away, causing the moment to be lost. Sure, they had been on better terms towards the end of the year, but it wasn't the same, not like before. There was still a slight awkwardness between them that wouldn't go away, and then he and Kat had broken up… and then Sammy had died… and it seemed like all the progress they had made, all the effort it had taken to get back to some semblance of friendship, had evaporated quicker than she could fathom, and they were back to not knowing how to act around each other.

Standing there now, waiting for him to say something, she suddenly realized how close he was. She could smell him, a scent she couldn't forget if she tried. Natural and clean, it swirled around her and made it hard to concentrate. And his brown eyes were deep and troubled, searching for something he could never find. She could see the hurt behind them, a hurt she knew all too well since Sammy's accident. She wanted to comfort him, hold him, wrap her arms around him and tell him it was going to be okay. But not yet. Not until he explained what was going on. They were all hurting. Losing Sammy had broken all of them, but that didn't mean he could just leave. It didn't mean that he could shut her out without any explanation. No, he was going to talk to her, whether he wanted to or not. She needed to know what he was thinking.

"Please Christian, talk to me. I know we haven't exactly been best friends lately, but I hate to see you in pain. You can't keep it all bottled up, you need to talk about it. I'm here for you, no matter what. You can talk to me." She stopped because she didn't know what else she could say. So she left it at that and hoped it was enough to get him to open up, to trust her again. Before she knew what she was doing, she reached out, took his hand in hers and squeezed gently. As she looked down to enjoy the sight of something that she had been missing for so long- the feeling of his skin on hers, the steady warmth of his hand- she couldn't help but smile. After everything that had happened, everything they had been through, it still felt right, natural, perfect.

"So did you?" His sudden question pulled her out of her reverie. She looked up, meeting his intense, penetrating stare. It caught her off-guard. "Did I what?" She asked, not sure what his question meant. "Did you win?" Oh, that's what he meant. The Prix. The finals. She looked down at her watch. Her solo already seemed so long ago that it was hard to wrap her head around the fact that it had barely been an hour since she had broken down on stage in front of the entire audience.

"No, I didn't," she answered, looking away. Admitting it hurt more than she thought it would. "Grace did." Even though she had gotten a near perfect score for her Red Shoes variation, her low contemporary score had left the door wide open. "I'm sorry," he said quietly. She could feel him squeeze her hand, his warmth spreading through her whole body, but she couldn't look him in the eye. She could feel the tears coming and she knew if she looked up, she wouldn't be able to hold them in.

"Hey, it's okay. You can cry if you want. I hear keeping things bottled up isn't good." She could hear the teasing in his voice, could picture the smirk on his face, but she knew he was being sincere. It wouldn't be the first time she had cried in front of him. It was comforting, and she couldn't help but laugh because he knew her so well. He knew what she was going through, how much the Prix had meant to her, how much she had wanted to win. So she laughed, and then before she could stop herself, she was crying, tears rolling freely down her cheeks.

"It's so unfair!" She yelled angrily. "I worked so hard all year and Grace barely even tried and she won! She's the Prix champion and she doesn't even care! She only did it so I wouldn't win! Not because it meant something to her! I went through so much this year between her drama, Saskia breaking my back…" She hesitated, afraid to say more, but knowing she had to... "You breaking up with me. Everything was falling apart! I wanted to tell you about what Saskia had done but you just pushed me away! When I called you about my scan and you agreed to come, I finally thought we were going to work things out between us but you were so cold and distant. Maybe I shouldn't have kissed you, but I was scared and I didn't know what else to do! I didn't know what was going to happen and I was so happy that you were there with me."

She took a deep breath in. She knew she was ranting, but she had to get it out, to let him know how she truly felt. Maybe then he would do the same. Not talking, staying silent, was what had gotten them into this mess in the first place and she was sick of it. She couldn't take it anymore. Before he could derail her train of thought, she kept going.

"You should have told me about Kat and how you felt about her!" She shouted, letting go of his hand. "I deserved to hear the truth from you, not through a walkie-talkie! Do you have any idea what it felt like? After everything we had been through! You broke my heart and pushed me aside as if what we had didn't mean anything! You never came to talk to me, to see if I was okay! You didn't call me after I got expelled! You were the only person I wanted to talk to! No one else! The others called and called, but not you. You abandoned me and left me all alone! It killed me Christian and I've been trying to put myself back together ever since!"

Her words rang out loudly as she finished and she couldn't help feeling proud of herself for finally saying what she had wanted to say all year. She was breathing heavily as she waited for him to respond, to give her some kind of idea of how he felt. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath in, reaching out to take hold of her hand again. The silence stretched between them and just when she thought he wasn't going to answer her, he did.

"Tara, I am so sorry for everything that happened this year." His voice was filled with pain and regret, making her anger evaporate instantly. She hated seeing him like this. "It all got so out of control. When you told me you had found my dad, I panicked. I was so angry at you for going behind my back. I pushed you away because I didn't want you to be involved in that part of my life. I didn't want you to know how broken I was, how much I hated my dad for what he did to my mom. He broke her heart and I didn't want anything to do with him. I should have talked to you about it, explained why I felt the way I did but you were the only good thing in my life and I didn't want my past to get in the way of it. I was so ashamed and I thought you wouldn't want to be with me if you knew the truth."

He stopped, and Tara knew he had been holding all that in for a very long time. "And what truth is that?" Tara asked, her words full of concern. When he didn't answer, she said, "Christian, what is it? What are you so afraid of?" Looking into his eyes, she tried to convey to him that he could tell her anything. That nothing he could say would ever be too much for her to handle. Whatever it was, it couldn't be worse than what had already happened. So he had baggage, who didn't? No one was perfect. She didn't understand why he thought so little of himself. When she looked at him, all she saw was someone who could do anything, be anything. The possibilities were endless. And all he saw was someone who had nothing. She had to figure out a way to show him how special he was.

Christian looked down and closed his eyes. Letting go of her hand, he looked up at her and clasped his hands around her shoulders. Then, as if he were fighting a battle within himself, he said, "What if I'm just like my dad? What if, no matter how hard I try, I keep messing it all up? From my mom getting sick, to robbing the server with Aaron, my brother refusing to help me after I got arrested, everything I put you through. Thinking that being with Kat would solve all my problems, using her, hoping that it would make me forget how much I loved you. Sammy… dying," his voice trembled a little when he mentioned their friend. "I keep letting everyone down. What if I can't change? I'm sick of hurting the people I care about, losing the people I love." He paused before adding, "I'm afraid of ending up alone."


	2. Chapter 2

**Thank you for my reviews and follows/favs! Especially to lovecamedown! Thanks for the helpful feedback! I hope you enjoy this next chapter! ~ Katie **

**Tara**

So that was it. His dad abandoning him, his mom dying, his brother leaving him to fend for himself, her not accepting him for who he was, for unintentionally bringing back all those painful memories. It was too much. How could she have been so thoughtless? Maybe she hadn't known all the details, but she knew his dad was a sore subject and she just plowed ahead anyway, not considering how it would make Christian feel. No wonder he had dumped her for Kat. Kat always knew the perfect thing to say or do. She was so cool and never worried what people thought about her. Tara thought too much. It was all she ever did. It was hard for her to live in the moment and just be happy. There was always something to fix. Or someone.

Hit with this realization, her breath caught in her throat and the tears started to flow again. Not angry ones like before, but sad ones. It was her fault. He had loved her and she had thrown it all away simply because she couldn't leave well enough alone! If only she could have stopped herself, resisted the urge to control everything and everyone… things might have turned out differently. This time it was her turn to say it.

"I'm sorry," she murmured softly.

"For what?" Christian asked, a look of confusion on his face.

"For trying to fix you, change you. For seeing you as a project and not as a person. For putting everything ahead of us, not taking the time to be there for you when you needed it… like Kat was. It's all my fault. It was always my fault! If I could have just let it be and enjoyed the time I had with you, maybe we would still be together! I ruined everything!"

"Hey, come here," Christian said softly, and she immediately melted into him.

He held her tightly and ran his fingers through her hair as she sobbed quietly into his chest. She wrapped her arms around him, savoring his warmth. When he held her like this, she felt safe, protected from every bad thing that had happened this year. She wasn't sure how long they stood there, but she didn't care. She didn't want to let go and hoped he didn't either. She closed her eyes and breathed deeply. Now that she was in his arms, his scent was even more intense than before. It made her think of all the good times: learning to trust each other in pas de deux, kissing on the beach after playing cricket and then again on the ferry, spending the summer with him on the farm, falling in love. It made all the bad times seem so far away, almost as if they didn't happen.

"Tara, what happened wasn't your fault. You were only trying to help me. Yeah sure, maybe you went about it in the wrong way, but it came from your heart, like everything you do." He pulled back, smiling slightly, and moved his hands up to hold her face, wiping away her tears with his thumbs.

Then his expression became serious and, looking deep into her eyes, he said, "I should have understood that you weren't doing it to hurt me. I overreacted but by the time I realized that, it was too late. I'm so sorry about Kat. It all happened so fast. One minute she was sitting down and the next thing I knew I was kissing her. When she stopped it, I couldn't believe what I had done! Part of me wanted to take it back, but the other part, the selfish part, didn't because it felt good to be that close to someone. I was upset about our fight in the club and I took advantage of the situation. I wanted to tell you, but we were already so on edge, I didn't want to make it worse. That's why I broke up with you in the studio and why I snapped at you at the hospital. I felt so guilty and I didn't know how to act around you."

She let his words sink in, trying to process everything he said. It was a bit overwhelming. Going from not talking at all to information overload. It made her a little dizzy, but she was glad that he had said it, that he was finally opening up to her. This was just what they needed to get back to the way things were. It gave her hope that he felt the same way she did. She reached up and placed her hands on his arms. His hands still cupped her face and she reveled in their warmth.

"Thank you for telling me everything. It means a lot to me. If only we had done this sooner." She laughed nervously and he gave her his trademark smirk. "It's not your fault either. You can't blame yourself for all the bad stuff that has happened to you. You weren't the reason your dad left or why your mom got sick. We don't always understand why things happen the way they do. And Sammy… he wouldn't want you to be so sad. He wouldn't blame you for what happened. It was an accident." The reality of her friend being gone hurt just as much now as it had a week ago.

"I miss him so much. He was there for me through everything! He called me over and over when I broke my back, to see how I was doing. He convinced me to fight for my spot, to not let Saskia win. He is the reason I'm even here. He wouldn't let me give up! I keep thinking I'm going to turn around and he's going to be there. While I was dancing tonight, it felt like he was with me, helping me through it. It still hasn't sunk in that he's really gone, that I'll never see him again."

"I know," Christian answered, his voice was strained and low. "I want to think it's all been a dream and that eventually I'll wake up. It'll be the morning of the Prix and nothing bad has even happened… We were supposed to go for a run together. If I had gone with him, maybe things would have turned out differently. I could have helped him! He might still be alive! Instead…" He didn't finish his sentence. He didn't need to. Tara knew why he hadn't gone with Sammy. He had come to see her. To tell her something. Something that she had been wanting to hear ever since they had broken up.

"Christian, stop it! It's not your fault!" She repeated, hoping that hearing it again would make him believe it. "You can't change what happened. And who knows? If you had been with him, maybe you would have been hurt – or worse…"

Her voice trailed off and her eyes widened as she spoke these words. As much as it hurt to know that Sammy was gone, thinking that it could have been Christian hurt more. She felt a twinge of guilt run through her. Even though she loved Sammy, it wasn't the same as the love she had for Christian. The kind of love that dug deep into her stomach, a good kind of pain that made everything else seem insignificant and meaningless. As though they were the only two people and no one else existed. That was how it had been – on the farm and during the beginning of the year – and living in a world without him, where she was alive and he wasn't… well, she didn't want to think about it. It hurt too much. Just trying to imagine it made her heart ache.

"As painful as losing Sammy has been, being without you would be even harder. Maybe it's wrong to say this, but I'm glad that you're weren't with him. If I had lost you too, I don't know what I would have done! What any of us would have done!" She added the last part because she didn't want to declare her feelings too soon. She still didn't know how he felt. Maybe it was silly, but she knew what it was like to be hurt by him, and she wanted to avoid feeling that way again. She could only hope that he wouldn't pick up on her momentary slip.

"Any of us, huh?" His eyes narrowed and his grip on her face tightened slightly. She could feel her cheeks reddening and she lowered her eyes, desperately trying to avoid his perceptive stare. Of course he could see right through her. She had never been a very good liar. Her heart pounded in her chest as the heat in her cheeks spread through her body, warming her despite the cold night air.

"Uh-huh." Her voice was shaky and she knew he wasn't fooled. She knew he could tell how nervous she was. She was glad he was still holding onto her because if he let go, she might not be able to stand on her own. She could feel her knees trembling, threatening to give way at any moment. She gripped his arms tighter, hoping it would somehow steady her.

"Tara… what's wrong?"

"N-nothing." She tried to meet his eyes, but she couldn't.

"Liar. I know you. I know when something's bothering you. This talking thing goes both ways. I had my turn and now it's yours. Please tell me what it is." His voice was gentle and reassuring. It gave her the courage she needed to open her mouth.

Mustering all the strength she could, she met his questioning stare. "It's just… I want you to know… I want to tell you how I feel but I'm afraid. After we broke up, it was like my world exploded. I know part of it was my fault but it hurt so much and what if you don't feel the same way? What if I tell you everything and it doesn't do any good? I know we had a moment in the dressing room, but I couldn't handle it if that's all it was! It's not enough! Surely, you must know… you have to see that!"

His eyes widened slightly and she could only hope that he understood what she was trying to tell him. How could he not? She had all but said it! If he knew her so well, why was he acting this way? Why was he making this so difficult? All she wanted was for him to hold her in his arms and kiss her like he used to- like she was the most important person in the world, as if no one else mattered. It had made her feel complete and she needed to feel that way again. He held her stare and she could see the wheels turning in his head, processing everything she had said. Kiss me! Just kiss me Christian! She begged silently. His silence was torture. How long was he going to make her wait?

And just when she thought he wouldn't, he leaned in slowly, a knowing smirk on his face, and kissed her.


	3. Chapter 3

**So thanks again for all the love! Hope you enjoy this next chapter! ~ Katie **

**Christian**

There it was. What he had been waiting for since he had left her in the dressing room. Why he had sat so long on the steps after walking out of the theater. When he had heard her calling his name, begging him to wait, he knew he had made the right decision. Even though he had met her with a less than cheerful reply, he was relieved that she had chased after him. It gave him hope that she still loved him, still wanted to be with him. It comforted him to think that there was still a chance to make things right.

The look on her face and the urgency in her voice as she poured her heart out, filled him with an excitement he hadn't felt in a long time. Before he could stop himself, his lips were on hers. He slowly lowered his hands from her face and wrapped his arms around her, pulling her close. He missed this. Holding her, kissing her like he needed her to breathe. Feeling the softness of her skin against his, a growing warmth spreading quickly through his body. He could feel her heart beating against his chest and it made his heart race faster. It was exhilarating! He didn't want it to end. He wished he could freeze time and stay in this moment with her forever! Not to sound cheesy, but it was true. When he was with her, everything seemed to fall into place. He knew where he belonged, he knew where he wanted to be.

What a jerk had had been! He had ruined it all, hurt Tara so much, wasted so much time when he could have been with her! Why had he gotten so angry? Why had he let such a small and insignificant thing get in the way of his happiness? How did he think being away from her would have been better? That Kat could have filled the huge hole she had left behind? Looking back, he knew now that he had never felt that way about Kat. Sure he had loved her, still did, but not like this. Never like this. He had wanted to because he knew how much Kat had loved him. But the truth was he had used her, latched on quickly, thinking that being with her would instantly fix everything. That it would somehow help him forget his feelings for Tara.

Reluctantly, he pulled back, ending their kiss. He watched her as she slowly opened her eyes, and looked up at him, her stare filled with the love that he had hoped she still felt for him. It gave him a sense of acceptance, contentment. Like no matter what, he wasn't alone, which was all he had ever wanted. They stood there in silence. Not the awkward silence that had plagued them for most of the year, but a silence that meant something more. Something special. Like they didn't have to say anything because they knew exactly what the other was thinking.

"What was that for?" She asked shyly after a few moments.

"Oh, I'm sorry, did you not want me to kiss you? Could've fooled me." He smirked. She had never been a good liar. She wanted to kiss him as much as he wanted to kiss her. It was so obvious. The only reason he had waited so long in the first place was because he wanted her to say it. Three words that would change everything. But in the end, she didn't need to. He just knew.

"Christian! Don't be mean!" She scolded, fighting to keep a straight face. She tried to break free from his grasp, but he held her tight, unwilling to let her go.

"Where do you think you're going, Training Bra?" He teased, a wide smile spreading across his face. Her cheeks reddened yet again but she seemed resigned to letting him hold her. As if she had a choice. She was strong, but he was stronger. This was the first time in a long time that they had been this close and he wasn't going to waste it. He wasn't going to let her escape so easily.

She laughed and wrapped her arms around his neck. He leaned in again, anticipating the warmth of her kiss sending shivers down his spine. His lips were just brushing against hers when she pulled back.

"Christian, wait. We need to talk about this."

"Haven't we done enough talking? I thought this was what you wanted Tara!" He couldn't help feeling annoyed. Hadn't he waited long enough? She made him believe she still loved him, still wanted to be with him! He had kissed her for crying out loud! And she had kissed him back! What else was there to talk about? This was crazy! How could he be angry with her and want to kiss her at the same time? It didn't make any sense! Only she could make him feel so happy one minute and so irritated the next.

"Of course it is! It's what I've wanted all year! But there's a reason it didn't work out before. We need to talk to each other, to come up with some sort of plan so we don't keep hurting each other!"

He could see the tears in her eyes and he knew she was telling the truth. She wanted this to work just as much as he did. His anger started to fade and he couldn't help feeling a little guilty. He hated seeing her cry. He always had such a short temper. It was always easier to blame other people for his problems than take responsibility for them. And he had blamed Tara for so much when, in reality, it had been all him. He was the reason they had broken up. He was the reason he had been so miserable. Instead of being grateful for having someone who cared so much about him that she would try so hard to help him, he had thrown it all away. As if none of it mattered.

But it did. It mattered so much. The fact that Tara knew all about his past and the stupid stuff he had done before coming to the academy, and still wanted to be with him, meant more than he could say.

"When we were together, it was like you became part of me. Like some sort of puzzle piece that I didn't know was missing. I know it sounds silly but I guess that's why I tried so hard to find your dad. You mean so much to me. I thought if you and your dad got to know each other and worked things out, you could be happy and would stop blaming yourself for all of the bad things that had happened to you. I'm sorry I pushed so hard, but it didn't make sense to me. Why he left, why he gave up a chance to be in your life."

"Tara, stop!" He knew where this was going and he didn't want to hear yet again how special he was. He knew that she was going to start singing his praises. She thought too well of him. She always had. She put him on a pedestal, making him out to be better than he was. He didn't deserve such attention. He didn't deserve to be told over and over again that he was worth it, that he had so much potential, blah blah blah.

"No Christian I won't stop! You're worth knowing! No matter what happened in the past, how much trouble you got into, whatever problems we've had, you need to know that. I am so happy that you're in my life, that I met you. It might not have all been smooth sailing but I don't regret any of it. You're so special and it breaks my heart that you can't see that. And I wanted your dad to see it too. Let him see all that he had missed out on, all that he could have been a part of. I guess I got a little carried away."

His head was spinning. Why did she have such faith in him? What had he ever done to earn such support? He couldn't wrap his head around it. After everything he had put her through, all the horrible things he had said and done, she was still here, still defending him, still helping him. He didn't deserve this! She was too good for him, but he had always known that.

He had never understood why she had chosen him. Him. Over Sammy, over Ethan. Over everyone else. Even though he knew her and Sammy had only ever been friends, he had always been jealous of their closeness, their automatic connection. Effortless and natural. Like they didn't have to try. It just was.

Ethan was a whole different story. He had been jealous of Ethan too, but in a completely different way. Ethan was everything he wasn't. Popular, confident, charming… rich. Easily attracting attention from all the right people. Including Tara. It was easy to see how taken she was by him. Which was silly because she didn't even know him. Granted neither did he, but he had heard things in the locker rooms. The way he'd play with girls' emotions, string them along, make them believe they were the most important person in the world. Then, out of nowhere, he would end it, leaving the girls heartbroken with some bogus explanation. The "It's not you, it's me" type of thing. He was such a good schmoozer that you didn't see it coming, until it was too late.

He had wanted to tell Tara, but he was never able to find the right way to say it. He felt guilty for not warning her but he had been in no position to judge. And she had seemed so happy. Besides, if Kat couldn't talk her out of it, then no one could.

He couldn't help but laugh. She was so stubborn! She wouldn't let anyone tell her what to do! She was stronger than most people gave her credit for. She went after what she wanted, regardless of what the outcome might be. She had never been able to leave well enough alone. She never gave up on anyone. She kept fighting for the people she cared about, no matter what.

"What's so funny?" She tilted her head to the side. He could see the wheels turning as she tried to figure it out.

"Just you," he shrugged. It was true. It wasn't hard to find something about her to laugh at. She definitely had a talent for embarrassing herself.

"Oh really? Well, I'm glad you find me so entertaining." She replied sarcastically.

"Never a dull moment with you Training Bra! That's one of the things I love about you-"

Before he could continue, she inhaled sharply and her eyes widened.

"What?" He was confused. Surely, she had to know the truth by now!

"Christian… did you just say..." He watched her as she let his words sink in.

Taking a deep breath in, he took her face in his hands again and looked straight into her eyes, willing her to understand. He didn't want to leave her with any doubt. He needed her to know exactly how he felt.

"Yes I did, Tara. And I mean it. I love you."


	4. Chapter 4

**Tara**

She couldn't breathe. She couldn't speak. Her heart was pounding loudly in her ears. He said it! And she knew he meant it. They had been strangers for so long that even though she wanted him to say it, it still came as a shock. Until recently, their only interactions had been out of necessity, never really being comfortable with each other, never sure what to say or do when the other was around.

He had played it cool, but she wasn't blind. She knew he was sorry for what had happened. She saw it in his eyes, in the way his shoulders would slump ever so slightly when he was around her. She had tried to be mad at him – and she was – but he was going through so much and she couldn't help forgiving him. And if he was happy with Kat, then that was all that mattered. His happiness was all she had ever cared about.

But here he was. He had come back to her. Despite all the drama, never seeing eye to eye on anything, her meddling and his short temper, they were here. Face to face. It made her heart race faster and she couldn't help but smile. He loved her! He loved her and she loved him and all she wanted to do was stay with him forever! To freeze this magic moment and never let him go!

Unable to hold back any longer, she leaned up to kiss him. His lips were warm, meeting hers with an eagerness that overwhelmed every part of her. After waiting so long for this, it was everything she hoped it would be! She loved how he held her, how special he made her feel. And she loved him. More than she thought it was possible to love anyone. She wrapped her arms low around his waist, inching herself closer to him, hoping it would be enough to let him know that she felt the same way he did. She hadn't actually said it like he had, but she wanted to show him. There would be plenty of time for talking later, but now all she wanted was this.

When they finally pulled back, they were both breathing heavily.

"What was that for?" He asked, repeating her question from earlier in an exaggerated tone. She knew he was teasing her so she decided to play along and tease him right back.

"I'm sorry, did you not want me to kiss you? Could've fooled me," she replied sarcastically.

"Who's being mean now Training Bra?"

"Just trying to keep up with you Christian! Don't dish it if you can't take it!"

And with that, she reached up and tickled him under his arms, causing him to let her go. She took advantage of his delayed reaction, running down the empty walkway with her arms in the air, celebrating her victory, laughing loudly as he raced to catch up to her.

"You think you're so clever don't you?" He yelled as he edged closer. "You know Tara, I'm going to catch you and when I do, it's not going to be pretty!" He was trying to sound intimidating, but she knew it was all for show. She could see right through him and knew he was playing the same game she was.

"I'll believe that when I see it!" She shot back playfully, adrenaline coursing through her body. It was exhilarating to feel so alive again after all the sadness of the past week. She was having too much fun to let him win just yet, so she kept running down the sidewalk.

When she decided he was far enough behind her, she stopped and clung to the railing, giving herself a few moments to catch her breath. As she admired the view of the harbor, the moon reflecting off the water and the lights glowing against the dark night, she couldn't help but think of Sammy. He had been her light in the darkness. When everything had been crashing down around her, he had remained constant. He had given her the courage to believe in herself again, to not give up, to fight for what she wanted. If it wasn't for him, she would probably still be back at the farm, her dream of being a professional dancer dashed for good.

She felt a hand on her shoulder, jolting her back to reality. She jumped and cried out in surprise, only to find Christian behind her. She was so lost in thought, that she hadn't heard him sneak up on her.

"Christian! You scared me!" Panting loudly, her hand clutching her chest.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to. Hey, are you okay?" He asked, reaching down to hold her hand, his voice full of concern. It made her heart melt, spreading goosebumps across her skin.

"Yeah… just thinking…"

"About?"

"Sammy… how much he would have loved this view. How he always saw the beauty in everything and never worried about any of the bad stuff. How much he loved dancing and his friends. He deserves to be here. Why isn't he here? It doesn't make any sense. What did he do wrong? How is it fair that he's gone? He had so much to offer and now he'll never get the chance to show it. It's not fair!"

She couldn't stop the tears from falling yet again. She stood there as Christian tried to pull her into a hug, but she pulled back, not wanting him to feel sorry for her. She didn't want his pity. She knew he felt the same way about Sammy, but she had already cried so much tonight that she didn't want him to have to clean up her mess.

"Let me go Christian! Leave me alone!" She wrenched her arm out of his grasp and started walking away from the opera house and towards the boarding house. She was so embarrassed! Why was she crying again? Weren't they just having fun? Wasn't she just laughing and teasing him without a care in the world? How had her mood changed so quickly? She wanted him to think she was strong! Not a weak little girl who couldn't control her emotions! Hadn't she cried enough tonight? Between the Red Shoes and being with Christian, hearing him tell her he loved her, she was exhausted. All she wanted to do was go back to her room and sleep.

"Tara wait!" She could here him shouting out her name. "Stop Tara! Please!" She was struck by a strong sense of déjà vu, except this time, he was the one chasing her. She wanted to be strong enough to ignore him, to keep walking, but she wasn't. She couldn't help waiting for him. After all, he had stopped for her and it had made all the difference.

"What do you want Christian?" She couldn't hide her frustration as she spun around to face him.

"You know what I want," he replied gently.

"Do I?" She asked, unsure of where he was going with this…

"You should. I thought I made it quite obvious." He smirked again and pulled her into his arms, holding her closer and tighter than he had before, looking deep into her eyes as if he had some hidden secret he was willing her to understand.

She could feel her eyes widen and her cheeks flush as she realized what he meant. Was he really suggesting what she thought he was? How dare he make such an assumption? They had just started talking again! This thing they had started was brand new! And he just expected her to go along with it? This was crazy! Not that she hadn't thought about it. Of course she had. Especially now that he had told her he loved her. How could she not? She wasn't a child.

"What Tara? Don't tell me you haven't thought about it?" How could he read her mind so easily? Know exactly what she was thinking as if she were saying it out loud?

"Christian… I… that's not the point!" She was trying to stay calm but he wasn't making it easy. "And since when do you say quite? The whole two years I've known you, I've never heard you say quite before!" She exclaimed, hoping to change the subject quickly. She wanted to go back to the joking and teasing. The way the conversation was going was making her uncomfortable.

"There's a lot you don't know about me, Training Bra!" He teased, taking the bait. Thank goodness! She was relieved even though she knew she couldn't avoid the subject forever.

"Oh really? Like what?" She asked doubtfully, wanting to keep him distracted.

He reached up and pushed her hair behind her shoulder, his hand brushing against her skin. It sent shivers down her spine.

"I hate peas." He said with mock seriousness.

She raised her eyebrows in disbelief at his ridiculous confession. She definitely hadn't expected him to say that! It made her laugh. He laughed too, like he knew he had said the right thing to lighten her mood. And he had.

"So is that it? Any other weird and obscure things I should know about?"

"Well I don't know about obscure or weird but there is something else, although you may have heard it before."

"Yeah? What's that?" Her nerves were getting the better of her, but she fought it because she wanted so desperately to hear what he was going to say. She had a feeling that it was going to be a little more substantial than his vegetable preferences.

"I love you Tara and I want to be with you."

Again, her breath caught in her throat. He had said it twice now and she knew he was waiting for her to respond. His sincerity pulled at her heart. She knew now she was ready to say it, and she wanted him to feel secure in the fact that she felt the same way he did. So, taking a deep breath in, she lifted up her hand, placing it gently on his cheek and prepared herself to say what she had wanted to say for so long.

"I know Christian. I love you too."


	5. Chapter 5

**Thank you all so much for the amazing reviews! Hope you enjoy the next chapter!**

**Christian**

He could feel the burning in his cheek where her hand was. He could feel his heart pounding loudly in his ears as she looked up at him, her green eyes bright and sincere. She had said it! She had said she loved him! Not that he didn't already know. She wasn't very good at hiding her emotions. It was written all over her face. Still, it felt good to hear.

Listening to her talk about Sammy, about how much he had helped and supported her when she had gotten expelled, made his heart ache. Sammy had really been there for her, unlike him. He had left her all alone! He had been so selfish! She had broken her back and all he had cared about was his hurt feelings! His pride had gotten in the way and by the time he realized what an idiot he had been, it was too late.

All he wanted to do now was pull her into his arms and never let her go. He wanted to wipe away her tears and tell her everything was going to be okay. She made him feel so special and he wanted to do the same for her. He wanted her to know, not just that he loved her, but how much. She had tried so hard to make him happy and he had acted like she meant nothing! He knew he had to find some way to make it up to her.

He wrapped his arms around her and held her. Not in a playful way like he had before, but in a way he hoped would show her how sorry he was for the way he had treated her. That he wouldn't let her down again, that he loved her more than he had ever loved anyone. He couldn't help feeling relieved when she leaned in against him, resting her head on his shoulder. He could hear her breathing, slow and deep. Closing his eyes, he breathed her in, savoring her closeness. He let his mind wander to the day when he first knew he loved her.

It was on the farm, during the summer he had spent with her. It was Christmas Day and they decided to go swimming with a group of her cousins. It was a long walk but there were too many of them to take the ATVs so they had no other choice. Her cousins were walking ahead of them but they didn't mind. They walked slowly, holding hands, with her showing him parts of the farm along the way. The first tree she ever climbed, the hill she used to roll down as a kid, and the barn with the hay bales she jumped off of when she had broken her wrist. They were laughing and joking when all of a sudden, they heard screams up ahead. They ran to where her cousins were. When they got there, Kate was hysterical and Colin was kneeling at the side of the path, carefully looking over the edge. The other three didn't seem to know how to react.

"What happened? Where's Charlie?" Tara asked nervously. Charlie was the youngest and he knew how close they were.

"He fell over the edge!" Kate shouted. She was a mess, tears falling uncontrollably.

"Calm down Kate, don't be so dramatic!" Tara crooned, rolling her eyes a little. Then she went over to Darcy, Ben and Alec and asked what happened. Before they could answer, Colin did instead.

"We told him to stay away from the edge! That it wasn't safe but he wouldn't listen. And then he fell!"

Tara knelt beside Colin and slowly looked over the side. He had walked up behind them, unsure of what to do. She must have heard him because she turned around and told him to look after the others. Being from the city, I guess they weren't used to things like this happening and didn't know how to deal with it. He didn't either, but he did what she asked, trying to comfort Kate the best he could.

Then, all of a sudden, she swung her legs over the edge and disappeared. This time it was his turn to freak out.

"Tara!" He cried out, not caring that his voice cracked a little. He couldn't believe she had just done that! Was she insane? What if she hurt herself? "Are you okay? Do you need help?"

"I'm fine! Stay where you are!"

He couldn't help leaving the others and going to kneel beside Colin. He leaned over and he could see that the drop wasn't as far as he thought. Still, it was steep but Tara had made it down without a problem. She was walking over to Charlie, who was lying on the ground unconscious. His legs were scraped and he had a cut on his forehead.

"Charlie? Charlie, can you hear me?" She said loudly but calmly, kneeling by his side. No response. "Charlie! Wake up! Open your eyes!" Again nothing. He could hear Colin breathing heavily beside him. He looked over to him and he could tell he wanted to go down there and help, but he was too afraid. He wasn't crying like Kate but his whole body was shaking.

"Hey, calm down. Tara knows what she's doing. It's going to be okay. Charlie is going to be okay," he said, trying to reassure him. Colin turned towards him and took a deep breath. Then he nodded his head and turned back to keep an eye on what was happening below.

"He's breathing! Charlie wake up! Can you hear me? Oh thank goodness! He's awake! Colin, get my phone in my bag and call the house! Tell Dad what happened and where we are! And tell him to bring the truck! He'll know what else to bring! Hurry! Christian can you come down? Bring a few towels! I need your help splinting his leg! It looks like it's broken! Be careful!"

They got up quickly and did as they were told. He made sure Colin found the phone and the others were okay before he carefully scaled down the ledge with the towels. When he reached the bottom, she was breaking branches off a tree and went to hold them against Charlie's leg. He couldn't help but stare. The shy and timid Tara was gone. The Tara in front of him was inspiring and he was in awe.

"Don't just stand there Christian! Bring those towels over here and help me! Don't move, Charlie. Okay Christian, give me the towels and then hold the branches on either side of his leg. Good. Now lift his leg gently. Okay, I'm going to tie the towels around his leg. Try and stay still Charlie. This may hurt a little but you're going to be okay. Uncle Neil is on his way." He set Charlie's leg down and she tied the towels around it, then knelt down in front of Charlie.

"Okay now put his leg on my lap. We need to keep it elevated. Cover him with the last towel. We don't want him to go into shock." He did what he was told yet again. "How do you feel Charlie? Can you wiggle you fingers and toes?"

"Yeah." Charlie did what she asked and he felt a wave of relief rush through him. "I want my mommy!"

"I know Charlie, just a little bit longer. Look up at the sky. Take deep breaths and close your eyes. Now imagine you're up there, flying through the air! Tell me what you see."

"The farm, the hills, the dam. We're swimming and splashing each other." He giggled. "You and Christian are kissing!"

"Charlie! Don't be smart! Focus on the sky!" Her cheeks turned bright red as she scolded her cousin, a goofy grin on her face. She looked up at him and he met her gaze with his trademark smirk.

About half an hour later, they heard a truck pulling up. Tara's dad jumped out and made his way over to them with a first-aid kit, water and a blanket. Charlie's dad was close behind. They stopped short as if they couldn't believe what they were seeing. He knew the feeling. They got over their shock quickly, then took over, transferring Charlie to the blanket, then to the back of the truck. Then Neil came over and hugged Tara and reached over to put a hand on his shoulder. They had done good.

Now free of her patient, she walked over to the ledge and shouted up. "Charlie's okay! Dad and Uncle Mike are taking us back in the truck! We'll meet you at the house!"

They jumped in the back with Charlie and he let out the breath he didn't realize he was holding.

The rest of their holiday had passed by with much less craziness than those first few days. Nothing could compare to watching Tara in action. Out of all the amazing moments they had spent together- swimming in the afternoons, taking long walks after dinner, watching the sunset, realizing they still wanted to be together- it was the day Charlie had broken his leg that had meant the most. There were so many to choose from and yet, he kept coming back to this one. Caring for her cousin, taking charge of a situation that easily could have gotten out of control, staying calm when everyone else was panicking; it made him realize how amazing she was and that he wanted to be like her. Strong and brave, kind and caring. She made him want to be better. Someone who thought about others more than himself. If only he had been worthy enough to deserve her.

"Christian? What are you thinking about?" Her gentle voice brought him back to the present.

He kissed her forehead before answering. "The farm. The day Charlie broke his leg."

"Really? Why that day? Wasn't there anything more important that happened last summer?" She asked, pulling back to look up at him, a little offended.

"Yeah? Like what?" He couldn't stop himself from teasing her yet again. She really did make it too easy.

"You think you're so smart, don't you?" She scoffed and she lightly slapped his chest.

"Just trying to keep up with you Training Bra!" He joked, again using one of her lines from before.

"Haha, very funny! But seriously, why was that day so special?" She eyed him suspiciously.

"Because it was the first time I knew I loved you," he stated in a very obvious tone.

She inhaled sharply, her eyes wide and asked, "Really? Why?" She really didn't get it. Why couldn't she see how brilliant she had been that day? That without her, things could have been a lot worse.

"Because you were incredible! Because everyone else, including me, was in a panic! Kate was a disaster, Colin was scared to death and the others had no idea what to do! You took control of the situation. You kept Charlie calm, distracted him from everything that was going on! You knew exactly what to do. If it wasn't for you, who knows what would have happened. You were inspiring! Even your dad was impressed! You saved the day-"

Before he could say anything else, he was interrupted by her lips on his. He could feel her wrapping her arms around him and he did the same. He loved being this close to her. He couldn't get enough! He continued to kiss her greedily and she met him with the same enthusiasm. He didn't want it to end so he would let her decide when to stop.

All too soon, she did. She stared at him in a way that made him a little nervous. Like she was trying to figure out all his secrets. To see if he really was telling the truth.

"You make it sound so much more exciting than it was. I did what needed to be done," she said matter-of-factly. "My cousins aren't really all that farm-savvy. Growing up in the city hasn't exactly given them any wilderness skills. They know the farm to a certain degree because they visit every year, but something like that… I guess it was too far out of their comfort zone. They aren't very good at thinking fast and on the farm, sometimes that's all you can do. So, that's really when you knew? Why didn't you tell me?"

"Why didn't you tell me when you first knew you loved me? You were trying to tell me all week before the showcase and you kept chickening out. Don't think I didn't notice! You said you loved my sneakers! That's how I knew you were hiding something and I figured that's what it was. You're a terrible liar." He smirked, then brushed a strand of hair off her face.

"Well, I didn't want to freak you out! Things were so good between us! We were happy and I didn't want to ruin it by saying something stupid!" She shouted defensively.

"Well that makes two of us Training Bra! You're not the only one who can do that. I am quite good at saying stupid things."

"There's that word again. Quite. Twice in one night. I must say I'm impressed,"she teased, stifling a yawn. It was getting late and she looked exhausted. He should probably walk her back to the dorm.

"Hey, you look beat. Let's get you to bed." He took her hand and started walking.

"Christian, I have to go back! I don't have my stuff and Kat's waiting for me!"

"I have my phone. I'll text her and let her know where we're heading and ask her to get your stuff."

"I think you may be overestimating Kat's generosity." She sounded doubtful but she seemed eager to not have to walk all the way back to the opera house.

"We'll see about that," knowing he was going to win this one. He texted Kat and when he got the reply he knew he would, he triumphantly showed Tara, laughing as she rolled her eyes in surrender. Then he wrapped his arm around her shoulder and they began to walk back to the boarding house.


	6. Chapter 6

**Tara**

She leaned into him as they walked in companionable silence back to the dorm. It felt nice to have his arm around her, his body shielding her from the cool night air. She had so many questions but she didn't want to break the silence. She didn't want to burst the magic bubble they had created.

She couldn't believe that watching her splint Charlie's leg was what had made him fall head over heels! She didn't even remember much of what had happened! It was a blur. One minute she was laughing and joking with Christian and the next she was scaling down the side of the ledge. Almost as if she wasn't in control of her own body. She had gone into rescue mode. Charlie was all that had mattered. He was easily her favorite cousin and if anything had happened to him, she would never have forgiven herself. Like she had told Christian, she did what needed to be done.

Besides, so much had happened last summer! Things that should be more memorable than breaking branches off a tree! They had gotten back together after all! They hadn't made it official until the last week of the summer, but until then it had been understood. They had been so comfortable with each other that it was easy to fall back into the hand-holding and the closeness that followed. It felt so natural, like they had never been apart.

The farm had a way of doing that. Putting you at ease, making you forget all the problems in your life. It was like, once you passed through the gate, a huge weight was lifted off your shoulders. You weren't in the real world anymore, but somewhere else. Almost like a dreamland. Nothing bad could happen, you were safe and secure, protected. She felt it every time she came home, and she could tell Christian had felt it too. She could see how different he was. How he talked and laughed way more than when they were at school. How he carried himself, like he didn't have a care in the world. He was free.

Remembering how he had been on the farm, she smiled and wrapped her arm around his back. She breathed in deeply and wished they were there right now. On that same hill where they had danced on the last day of their holiday. It had been perfect. She could smell the grass and feel the sun on her face, remembering how much she loved dancing with him, how much she loved him.

So much had happened since then. Their break-up, her injury, fighting with Kat, Grace and all her games, Sammy's accident. It was hard to wrap her head around it. She was only seventeen but she felt so much older! Like she had lived ten lives already! Never in her wildest dreams did she ever think she would have experienced all that she had since coming to the academy! She couldn't believe the year was over. She had thought it would never end, but looking back now, she realized how quickly it had gone. Granted, she had spent almost two months away because of her injury and expulsion.

Thinking about that part of the year was still hard for her. Being told she couldn't dance, exiled from the place where she finally felt like she belonged. That was why, when she got home, she had closed herself off from everyone.

It was the only time that the farm hadn't been a safe haven for her. In that moment, all it felt like was a cage, keeping her from following her dream, shutting her out from the rest of the world instead of sheltering her from it. Being there was a constant reminder of all that she had lost, how far she had fallen. So she had shut down because feeling empty, feeling nothing was easier than feeling the pain – of missing her friends, missing Christian. She had felt so betrayed. She didn't hate them, but she didn't want to talk to them either. Well, she had wanted to talk to Christian, but he never called. She wanted him to so much, but he had stayed silent, making it that much harder to deal with everything that was going on. If only he had called, if only he had talked to her, then maybe it would all have been easier to bear.

When she finally did come back to the academy, it was as if the world had shifted. It felt good to be able to dance again, but it wasn't the same. Walking through the hallways didn't give her the same sense of security it had before. It was like she was starting all over again, a timid first year, with no real life experience. She felt as though she was walking on eggshells around everyone, especially Kat and Christian, and they were doing the same.

She knew it had been childish not to confront them and talk things out but they hadn't talked to her. Well, Kat had tried but she really didn't want to hear it. She was afraid to hear what her friend had to say because it would only remind her of what had happened. That Christian had chosen Kat over her, that he didn't love her anymore, that it was over. She wasn't ready for that. She had still loved him so much and knowing he wanted to be with someone else, especially her best friend, hurt more than she wanted to admit.

How could he just push her aside so easily? She knew he hadn't meant to hurt her but it still hurt! She wanted him to be happy but she was still heartbroken! But what could she do? Keep bothering him until he had no other choice than to talk to her? She hadn't been brave enough to do that. She was still adjusting, getting back into the swing of things. People were already talking about her controversial return and she didn't want any extra attention.

It was hard to forget the loneliness she felt during those first couple of weeks. Even though she had Grace and Sammy, it was not having Kat that made it so hard. Seeing her but not having the courage to be around her. Not having the strength to swallow her pride and actually listen to what Kat had to say. She had been so hurt that she thought blaming Kat would give her some sort of comfort, a way of knowing that she was right, justified in believing that she was the victim. She hadn't thought about how ending their friendship would make Kat feel. She had only been thinking of herself. When she finally did reconcile with Kat, she was so happy. She couldn't believe it had taken something as silly as a trapeze ride to make her realize that their friendship was more important than fighting over a boy.

The same boy who just happened to be walking right next to her now. What was that saying about letting someone go? That if it was meant to be, that person would come back to you. Well here he was. And he had told her he loved her. And he had kissed her. And she had kissed him. And she told him she loved him. But what was next? Where did they go from here? By some twist of fate, they had been given a second chance. To start over, to make things right. But what did that mean? What was it going to take? Sure they had cleared the air a little, gotten some things out in the open. She felt a lot better than before. But it wasn't enough. She needed more. Full disclosure.

The questions from before were still buzzing around in her head. As much as she tried to push them aside, they wouldn't budge. She had to know what he had meant before. She had a pretty good idea, and was glad when he had played along, but she needed to know for sure. They had been apart for so long that even if they were together now, they were basically starting from scratch. They were such different people than they had been at the beginning of the year. So much had changed. Maybe at some point they could think about more, but they needed to be friends again first. They were getting there, but they still had a very long way to go.

Bracing herself for impact, she stopped walking. He stopped too and looked at her curiously. Clenching her fists nervously, she whispered, "What did you mean earlier?"

"About what?"

"About… you know…"

"I do?" He narrowed his eyes and for once she couldn't tell if he was teasing or being serious.

He had to know what she meant! Was he really going to make her say it? Just the thought of saying it out loud made her cheeks flush and her heart race! It was so hard for her to talk about because it was something she knew nothing about. She knew he did, that he had been with girls in the past, which only made it more embarrassing. She tried to gather her thoughts, to decide how to word it. It was going to be painful no matter how she said it.

"What did you want before that was quite obvious?"

A look of realization flashed across his face. "Oh that… look Tara, we don't have to talk about that-"

"Why not? We're talking about everything else! Besides you started it! And now I can't get it out of my head! It's all I can think about!"

"Really? Why?"

"Why do you think? This is the closest we've been in such a long time! I can't help it."

"Does that mean-" he raised his eyebrows hopefully.

"I don't know what it means! My head is spinning! Tonight has been wonderful and I'm so happy that I'm here with you but… after the crazy year we've had, I'm not ready. We're not ready! I love you Christian and I want to be with you, but so much has happened. We've changed so much. We have to get to know each other again. I'm sorry but it's true. Are you angry?"

She held her breath as she waited for his response. She wouldn't blame him if he was angry but she hoped he wasn't. She needed him to understand where she was coming from. They had both been hurt and needed time to heal. Kat had just broken up with him and she was technically still with Ben.

Oh no Ben! What was she going to tell Ben? Surely he knew by now that she was with Christian. Kat must have told him that they were together. What was Ben going to say? Even though she didn't feel the same way for him as she did for Christian, she still cared about him. Just because she didn't want to be with him didn't mean she wanted to hurt him. He had been so good to her after she had broken up with Christian and when she came back to the academy. They became such good friends. He had been so sweet that she couldn't help falling for him. She needed him so much this year and he had been there for her. He had filled the emptiness that Christian had left behind. She had been in such a dark place and just like Sammy, he had pulled her back into the light. He made her so happy and she had wanted his positivity to rub off on her somehow.

When he had surprised her with the ice rink, she decided to give him a second chance. Even though he had used her during the Prix, even though he never seemed to say or do the right thing at the right time. He didn't deserve to be pushed aside.

And she had tried. To forget about Christian, to forget how much she loved him. She had tried to focus all her attention on Ben, to make him feel as special as he had made her feel. She tried to move on, to tell herself that it was for the best. Ben was good for her, they were good together. She was a better person for knowing him. But it wasn't enough. She could feel it, even before Kat and Christian had broken up, even before Sammy had died. As much as she wanted to make things work with Ben, she knew being with him would never to compare to when she was with Christian.

And now that she knew how Christian felt, what other choice did she have? Ben would always be special to her. She would always be grateful to him for all he had done for her. He had saved her, brought her back from the abyss. They had so much fun together and his friendship would always mean so much to her. She would never forget all the good times they had.

But no matter how much she tried to deny it, it would always be Christian. Tonight was proof of that. If it wasn't meant to be, they wouldn't be here. He would be with Kat, she would be with Ben and they wouldn't be walking back to the boarding house together. She wouldn't have chased after him, he wouldn't have waited for her and they wouldn't be entertaining thoughts of what could happen tonight.

"Of course I'm not angry! Why would you think that?" he asked, holding her hands in his. The gentleness in his voice calmed and reassured her. "I just want you to be happy. I want us to be happy. After everything we've been through this year, I get it. I don't want to force anything. We'll take it slow. All I want is to be with you."

Relief coursed through her and she let out a breath she didn't know she was holding. He really meant it! "That's all I want too. I missed you so much. I never thought we would get a second chance but I'm so glad we did. It's just so overwhelming… It's not that I don't want to-"

"Tara, it's okay. I told you we don't have to talk about this right now," he said again. She could tell he didn't want to make her feel uncomfortable, but she knew she couldn't avoid it any longer. She didn't want to. She was ready to lay everything out, leave nothing to the imagination.

"Yes we do! I want to be completely honest with you. We can't be together and not talk to each other. It won't work. And I want this to work. It's all I've dreamed about since we broke up! Losing you hurt so much and I don't think I could go through that again!"

He reached up to hold her face in his hands. "I'm so sorry Tara. For hurting you, for letting you down. I know I don't deserve a second chance. I know that there were times when I should have been there for you and I wasn't. But I'm here now. I screwed up so much this year, but I am going to do whatever I can to make it up to you. No matter what happens, I will always be here for you. I won't leave you again."

His hands were warm on her face and his words gave her hope. They were going to be okay, everything was going to work out. They were going to be together. Not knowing what to say or how to say it, she simply smiled and leaned in and kissed him, knowing that it would be enough.


End file.
